


The Date

by Batjokespirkylux



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: M/M, Pointless little fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:09:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27194254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Batjokespirkylux/pseuds/Batjokespirkylux
Summary: Alfred is asked by Bruce to leave the house because of an upcoming date that seems to have Bruce more nervous than usual. Alfred wonders why Bruce would be so anxious about Selina Kyle coming over...and why it is that he seems to be avoiding mentioning her name...(In which Alfred gets the wrong end of the stick, basically)
Relationships: Alfred Pennyworth & Bruce Wayne, Jeremiah Valeska/Bruce Wayne
Comments: 4
Kudos: 54





	The Date

The Date:

“Alfred, you need to find something to do tonight”. Bruce very rarely used his authoritative rich boy voice, so whenever he did Alfred had to resist the urge to smirk.  
“Indeed, sir, and why might that be?” Bruce tried to hide the smile on his face.  
“I have a date.”  
“A date! How exciting. And why must I leave the house for a trivial matter such as that?” Alfred enjoyed watching Bruce squirm. It was odd, though, for Bruce to insist he leave the house. Last time Miss Kyle came around for a date he was merely shoved out of the kitchen.  
“Because…” Bruce seemed, for a moment, at a loss. “Because it’s a special date. And I had enough trouble convincing them to come without you being around.”   
Alfred was slightly offended by this. How could miss grumpy herself actually request Alfred leave? He knew he and Miss Kyle had never seen eye to eye, but to insist he was gone was a little bizarre.  
He tried not to think about the implications of his young master running rampant around the house with a female suitor, and tried to take his mind off things by planning his evening. Perhaps he would go see a show. Perhaps Jim and Harvey were off work that evening and wouldn’t mind getting a few beers. They could even invite Lucious – although that man’s capacity for beer did leave some to be desired. He was lost in thought for a moment, but was brought back to the present by his young master practically choking down his breakfast.  
“Hold your horses master Bruce – what time will your date be arriving? Surely not any time soon!” Alfred enjoyed playing the pronoun game with Bruce, who never did seem to be able to admit his feelings for that girl out in the open.   
“No, but I’ve got lots to get ready!”  
“At nine in the morning? Crikey – that is a special date!”  
Bruce nodded gravely, and rushed off into the parlous.

Alfred usually kept himself busy dusting and cleaning the immense mansion, or polishing the immense garage of cars, but today he was kept busy studying his young master’s increasingly odd behaviour. Bruce let in a food delivery at ten, and had been frantically cooking since then. The smells from the kitchen were nice, although slightly bizarre, and Bruce hadn’t paused for a moment since. He had spent twenty minutes earlier moving furniture around downstairs in the parlour – a time that probably doubled how long he’d spent in that room for the past week or so. Bruce had also set about closing the curtains. If this was his idea of creating a romantic mood it was a strange one. The first date Bruce had entertained here he’d been somewhat nervous, but this was on a completely different level.  
“Anything I can help you with, sir?”  
“You could help me move this sofa- I think it should be facing the other way.”  
“Will you be sitting on this sofa, master Bruce?”  
“Well… probably not but it’ll still look better facing this way.”  
“If you say so, Master Bruce, although I hasten to add that your father and mother preferred it the original way.”  
“They can’t have got everything right, Alfred, they were only human.”  
“I imagine their way of placing sofas was quite ordinary, Master Bruce.”  
Bruce straightened up from where he had been moving the coffee table, his eyes glazed over slightly, probably thinking about his parents.  
“Yes, I suppose it probably was.” Bruce always seemed to take everything Alfred said with utmost consideration at the moment, which Alfred was somewhat pleased with and somehow concerned. 

At around six in the evening Bruce spent precisely fourteen minutes brushing the same patch of hair while looking in the mirror and squinting at himself. Alfred had counted, watching him from the arm chair in the corner of his room. Bruce had come into Alfred’s room with the pretence of asking Alfred his opinion on his outfit choice, but Alfred had the sneaking suspicion it was to check Alfred intended on leaving the house. Bruce, to Alfred’s surprise, had not gone for his usual toned-down gentlemanly approach, but instead wore a pressed navy suit with double breasted buttons.   
“A full suit – this is a special date.”  
“You have no idea Alfred – I’ve been trying to set this up for months.”   
This confused Alfred – what on earth could a street cat have to do to keep her too busy for months? Playing hard to get, he supposed, that was an old trick.   
It seemed to have worked on Bruce, whose nerves seemed to be getting the better of him.   
“Master Bruce, you’ve brushed that bit for quite some time now – I think its plenty brushed.”  
Bruce blushed slightly.  
Alfred had been instructed to leave at seven. He enjoyed torturing Bruce, and so at quarter to he finally began to get ready to go out. Jim was coming to pick him up and the men were going on a night on the town. He had heard rumours they might stop by the Sirens club, which he certainly wasn’t going to say no to – it was men’s night after all. Bruce was practically bouncing off the walls, nervously fidgeting with his cuff links and checking his watch. 

“Alfred.”   
Alfred ignored his master and spent some time sorting out his own hair – he wondered if fourteen minutes was too long to wind Bruce up. He liked the idea of getting to see Selina too – he wondered if she’d made the same effort Bruce had.  
“Alfred its nearly seven.”  
“Master Bruce, you asked me to leave by seven and I will.”  
“I meant before seven.”  
“Before? Why before?”  
“Because they arrive at seven.”  
“Oh dear, how terribly foolish of me Master Bruce, I thought you meant I should leave at seven. Never mind, I’m sure having your butler around to open the door will simply make Miss Kyle feel at home.”  
In exasperation Bruce blurted out  
“It’s not Selina.”  
The air in the room felt still for a moment and Alfred straightened up to look at his young master.  
“Not Selina Kyle? My goodness, I never thought we’d get over that one.”  
Bruce nodded sheepishly and looked at his watch again.  
“And who, may I ask, will be in attendance of your date tonight Master Bruce?”  
Bruce shook his head.  
“You may not ask Alfred.”  
The noise of the gate buzzer rang through the house.  
“Never mind, Master Bruce, I’m about to find out.”  
Bruce reached for the gate phone but years of practice held the advantage for Alfred.   
“Hello, Wayne Residence, This is Alfred Pennyworth – who may I say is calling?”  
An uncertain voice on the end of the line.  
“Uhh, right, umm hello this is Jeremiah Valeska. Here to see Bruce Wayne”.  
Alfred looked at Bruce and suddenly everything began to make sense. Bruce’s sudden interest in checking in on those his company invested in. All those days working in the lab. Bruce was a man of science but he was also young and grew tired of things easily. He hadn’t lost focus on the project he and Jeremiah had been working on. Now Alfred knew why.

“Very good sir, I’ll buzz you through”. Alfred couldn’t help but smile at the mortification on Bruce’s face.  
“Have a good evening, Bruce, I hope your date goes as well as you want it to. I must admit, I’m a little relieved that you genuinely have been cooped up with Valeska, rather than sneaking off to fight crime. Although, I must say I am a little surprised you’ve managed to convince him to come here.”  
“That’s why it has to be perfect.”  
“Well, next time you want a perfect date, why don’t you let your Butler in a little so I may help you.”  
“I…I suppose I should…” Bruce still looked a little uneasy.  
“Master Bruce… You should know that it doesn’t matter to me whoever you invite on a date in this house. Its your house, and you’re my ward. As long as you’re safe and happy I consider it a job well done.”  
“Thanks Alfred – now please get out.” 

Children never are as grateful as they should be.


End file.
